The male G-spot or Prostate is located up your bum and can only be accessed that way. It is not actually inside your anus which is commonly thought, but this is the only way it can be reached. It’s that small walnut sized bump you will feel if you gently press the pad of your finger towards the front.
Be gentle and just see what happens.
Finding and getting to know your G-spot is well worth the effort. The rewards will be some of the most intense orgasms you can imagine. Knowing how to find it will also mean that when you make the beast with two backs you will have one more trick up your sleeve ( or butt ).
Apart from being a hell of a lot of fun there are actually some health benefits that can be had from stimulating the male G-spot. These are improved circulation to the prostate, enhanced libido, improved semen production and a stonier erection. Regular ejaculation is also believed to increase prostate health too.
The more pleasurable benefits of stimulating the male G-spot are multiple orgasms (my personal favorite ), enhanced sexual desire and more intense orgasms.
If you are bottoming one way you can stimulate your G-spot by sitting on top and leaning back. The idea being to move so that your partners penis pushes against the front of your anus and behind your balls.
If you are topping keep this trick in mind. Finding you partners G-spot is a sure fire way to kick things in to power bottom overdrive.
Like all things sexy a little experimentation is required and getting to know your own body will help you not only enjoy sex a little more but also know how to increase that pleasure for your partner too.
Lastly it’s important for your health to make sure all men over the age of 25 and especially over the age of 50 to have regular prostate exams to aid in the detection of prostate cancer or other urinary conditions. If One Direction are not available I suggest speaking to your Doctor or local GP.
I really like this question’s intro because it spotlights all the uneasiness many men have with their manhoodness. Prostate massage isn’t a gay thing, you see. Not at all. Prostate massage is a male thing. The confusion’s origin is easy to understand, but should corrected also. By the simple fact of not being run-off-the-mill heterosexuals, gays have to accept very early the fact that they do not fit the Norm. While this is difficult — and most of us have painful teen years memories to attest this — it also have upsides : freed from the Norm, gays can explore their sexuality without fear.
Gays don’t have to be afraid to lose a label they’ve already lost anyway, and this allows them to explore every facet of their sexuality without restriction. Not having to deal with the Norm, gays can live their maleness to the fullest, unbridled. This results in many non standard approaches to sexual stimulation, including (of course) prostatic stimulation. Unfortunately, these non-standard sexual approaches often do not fit the Norm. And society tends to be very strict about what a real man is. Deviate a little form the Norm and you are threatened to lose the sacrosanct Real Man label. In fact, it would seem that just thinking about deviating from the narrow path of the male Norm can be enough to threaten your status.
You can easily understand why, in this context, so many places are off-limits. Heck, even a prostate exam at the doctor’s office could be a dangerous threat to your Real Man label ! I’m being a little goofy, of course, but there is an unfortunate truth behind this. And this is really sad, especially for all these straight men who end up figuratively gagged and bound in their sexual life, never allowing themselves to explore, simply out of fear of not being a Real Man.
There is nothing in the male’s hardware that differentiates a gay male from a straight male (1). What this means of course is that if gay men have found parts of their body to be the source of pleasure, the same body parts are going to be pleasurable for straight men too, even if the Norm has decided that this body part is off limits.
What this means also is that the only difference between gays and straights is what turns them on. And that is what is so frightening for the ambivalent straight who doesn’t want to accept the fact. Since all types are being similar, enforcing off-limits body parts permits differentiation of the good straights from the evil gays (their words, not mine) because there’s no real way to tell otherwise.
Which brings us back to Anonymous’ question intro : “I’m not gay but I like prostate massage”. Rest assured, dear Anonymous, that liking prostate massage won’t make you gay. Yes you will deviate from the Norm, but if you are strong and confident enough, you’ll understand that, whatever the Norm wants you to believe, you will always be a Real Man
b) The question
Virtually all guys will find prostatic massage interesting. Some more than others, granted, but the dividing line does not follow the gay / straight categorization. Whatever their sexual preference, a fair percentage of men find prostatic massage arousing… once they stop being uptight about this possibility, of course.
Prostate stimulation is not dangerous in any way (unless you do something stupid like poking a sharp object into your behind, of course) and <em>cannot</em> lead to erection or any other sexual problems by itself. Prostate stimulation will not cause a decrease in your penis sensitivity nor will it affect negatively your ability to ejaculate. And in fact it could improve both. How ? Since prostate stimulation increases your sexual awareness, it may help you focus more on your sensations, and thus increase your perception of your penis. Since prostate massage stabilizes your prostate during ejaculation, more energy is available to propel semen out of your cock, and thus lead to more powerful ejaculation.
How does one stimulate the prostate ? You mention that you cannot tolerate big objects inside your anus and this is totally fine as you do not need to distend the anus to stimulate the prostate. You don’t >need to use a dildo. Yes you can, but you don’t need to.
Any thin, blunt object will do, as long as it is finger shaped. Good news then. The other good news is that the prostate is easily within reach (less than 7 cm from the anus) and the only thing you need to do to massage the prostate is to touch it with the tip of your finger.
1- First things first : where’s the prostate ?
The prostate is the small walnut-sized gland you see at the tip of the finger. As I said earlier but worth noting again, is the fact that the prostate is very accessible : you can see that the finger isn’t very deep inside the rectum… The prostate is just outside the rectum wall, so you will touch it through the rectal wall, never directly. When you are lying on your back, the prostate is towards your cock, not towards your back…
2- What does the prostate feel like ?
The prostate is made of two lobes, at least when approached from the rectum, so you will feel a groove in the centre, with an ovoid bump on each side.
For a young man, the prostate is walnut-sized, but as men grow older, the prostate may enlarge too (causing voiding problems…) but this enlarged ping-pong-sized prostate is still normal. The prostate has a rubbery feel with a slight give, think of these erasers to get the idea : The prostate has a smooth surface (aside from the groove) : if you feel a hard bump somewhere, get checked !!!
3- What to do?
It is strongly recommended to use some lube as the rectal mucosa (lining) is very sensitive and easily bruised.
Also, take the time to empty your bladder, at least the first few times, so that you’ll be at ease. The most widely available instrument is your finger. Insert you finger in your anus, and gently press and rub the prostate. At first, you may wish to try it without doing anything else, just to experiment the feeling first hand. When you do, you’ll feel a blurry sensation deep inside.
A mixture of unusual and more familiar feelings. You’ll feel as if you need to go pee : that feeling will become less present as you practice, but it will be the first impression you’ll have the first time you try… You’ll feel as if you were about to cum. You’ll also feel a blurry penile sensation that will somewhat remind you of your masturbation experience, but deeper in your body and less focussed. You may find it difficult to masturbate comfortably as you finger your prostate. Using a prostate massager may thus be easier. There are many available. The modern pioneer is the Aneros (item 90 in the drawing).
As you can see it has a slender neck, avoiding anal dilation, yet it widens as it reaches the prostate giving a nice prostatic massage. Items 95 and 96 are fulcrums that stabilize the finger, but also act as springs, pulling and pushing the finger as you move and as your anus and perineal muscles contract in response to your arousal. As a result actively massaging the prostate instead of creating a constant pressure. There are other variations. The Nexus Revo has a bigger base for those who like some anal dilation, and the prostatic finger vibrates too.
All in all, prostatic stimulation deserves to be tried. Without prejudice and without fear : it won’t turn you into something you aren’t and it may allow you to improve who you are. Hope this helps.
The Prostate Gland is an important sex organ and also the G-spot of a man.
The prostate gland produces prostatic fluid, the lubricant that facilitates the ejaculation of sperm.
Protesatic fluid is a whitish secretion and gives ejaculation its whitish appearance. It collects within the prostate and feeds into the urethra during ejaculation. Prostatic fluid makes up about one-third of the total ejaculate, al ong with sperm and seminal fluid. It helps sperm to swim and protects them from being damaged by the acidity of urine in the urethra.
The prostate lies just below the bladder and just in front of the rectum. You can find the prostate by placing your index finger all the way in your anus and pressing towards the front of your body along the rectal wall. It should be about two inches inside the anus. Rub gently and slowly, as any sudden hitting of the prostate can be painful. In some men who take Anal it will cause spontaneous ejaculation.
When my good friend would play with my ass after it would get horny and tingle, for some reason his dick is the perfect size as well as fingers and slowly penetrating and hitting the prostate gland would feel like I was in heaven.
A healthy prostate will feel like a lump the size of a small walnut, and the texture is similar to the ball of muscle at the V of the thumb and index finger when making a fist.
The prostate enlarges during arousal, so it is easier to feel then. The prostate gland is very sensitive to stimulation and feels amazing when you have someone doing it right.
It can only be stimulated internally that is, by inserting a finger, dick, or toy into the ass. When you are highly aroused, in the sustained plateau phase, you can rub it to see if you like the feeling or whether it affects your ejaculation.
I know that most readers here probably don’t care who the butt players are, who the “bottoms” are or why, because they realize it’s part of our nature as men and as masturbators to explore all areas of our bodies regardless of our sexuality. This article is for anyone who has ever considered touching their butthole, pleasuring it, asking their partner to, but felt concerned that maybe it means something else. “Maybe I’m gay…” Hell, if you can read this then it’s for you! It’s for anyone who is interested or who is currently sitting there with a finger in their ass, hehe! Bet it feels good, huh??
Gentleman, let’s pull off the blindfolds and erase this stigma that surrounds butt play, shall we? For those of us that have tested the waters down there, that enjoyed it or even tried it and didn’t enjoy it, for those of us who cannot reach orgasm without it or do it because our significant other enjoys it, more power to us. We know that it’s just another sexual act that helps induce orgasm. No matter what your sexuality is, it does not define you, like most things do not, duh!
Now, I’m not telling you to put your fingers up your bum or a fancy toy or hell, stuff a random cock up there. That’s not what I’m saying (or is it!?). However, I am being an advocate of any and all anal play and pointing out the joys that come with it without conforming and believing the social stigmas that have been attached to it. We have the freedom to believe what we want, but I can assure you a finger or a toy is not going to “make you gay”, in and of itself.
assturbate
to get sexual gratification through self-stimulation through the anus!
Urban Dictionary
Many men, straight men, bisexual men – classify them as you will – have this fear that anything in the ass might turn them gay. If their girlfriends/wives find out they might leave, spread rumors, and tell her friends and family that they’ve been with a queer this whole time. This is not true and besides, you know the truth. Anal play, like I mentioned above, is simply another act of sexual pleasure.
Now that that’s settled, let us explore some amazing, orgasm inducing anal pleasures. First of all, we must understand that all men come equipped with what is called a prostate:
Prostate gland, including the bladder and seminal vesicle.
The prostate gland is a male reproductive organ whose main function is to secrete prostate fluid, one of the components of semen. The muscles of the prostate gland also help propel this seminal fluid into the urethra during ejaculation.” Prostate gland, including the bladder and seminal vesicle
The prostate gland is capable of producing incredibly pleasurable sensations when properly stimulated. It can be massaged from the outside through the perineum or “taint” – the bridge of skin just under your balls to your anus. As the pleasure is heightened, you (or your partner) may want to explore inside your hole, actually massaging the prostate itself. Although it is not scientifically proven, it is said that the more prostate massaging and ejaculation you do, the lower your risk of prostate cancer, so bate and bate and bate some more.
From the methods of anal pleasure to sex toys and partner play, the anus is far from being neglected when it comes to male ass play. I typically enjoy a finger or two once in awhile just rubbing my hole on the outside, teasing it like a clit, my “boy pussy” if you will. Although it doesn’t come into physical contact with the prostate, it sends unbelievable waves and pulses up to it and to your cock all throughout your body, deepening this sexual experience while masturbating. A tongue is unbelievably amazing. Again, no actual prostate contact, but the sensation is absolutely incredible. Who doesn’t like their salad tossed? You’ll need a partner for that, so hopefully you have an open minded, explorative one like yourself and trust me, if you do, you’ll want to keep them around.
You may have heard of the Aneros. It’s a toy specifically made for the male ass to enjoy. Its shape and size is a perfect fit for the male “p-spot” and its unobtrusive design is meant to let you know that it’s not about a penis up your ass, you don’t have to put a cock in it to enjoy the pleasures of “anal sex.” It’s meant for all men of all shapes and sizes and walks of life. I’m desperately wanting to get my hands on one and try it out, write a blog entirely of my Aneros experience and more than likely guaranteed recommendation. I smell a future blog!
Anal beads are enjoyable and come highly recommended by a lot of folks. Again, I’ve never tried them myself, but I’ve heard great things. Then there are anal plugs and prostate vibrators and massagers a lot like the Aneros, but take on different shapes and sizes. There are always dildos too, of course, made to be like real cocks. By all means, have at it. I can guarantee that they wouldn’t make you gay either if you already are not, haha, I just like the idea of these unobtrusive, nondescript toys that lend no specific gender and are made simply for the p-spot pleasure. Alright, now I’m beginning to think even taking a real cock up your manhole doesn’t make you gay. Is this true? Is that possible? I believe it actually is. Am I crazy? We’ll save that for another discussion. We’re talking about toys here folks, things designed for self-pleasuring and the enjoyment of masturbation.
No shame here, but I’m about to get personal for a moment. When I was a lot younger and way more into penetrating my butthole, I would use any old household item that was phallic like and safe, of course. From markers (the rounded, cylindrical type ones; sharpies to be more precise) to the actual handle of a plunger or the handle part of a hair brush. As long as it was round with no sharp edges and was able to be greased up for easy entry, I used it. Fingers are fun, but sometimes you just want something thicker and longer. I’m not suggesting the use of these foreign objects, but since I’ve grown up a bit I’ve “graduated” to the use of and enjoyment of just a finger or two or these more intentional, professional, made-for-butt-penetration type toys.
We all have a personal evolution of our masturbation (and continuing evolution); I think as I do get older, prostate stimulation has become an additional, insane orgasmic, healing remedy while masturbating. Since I understand my cock more and how my body functions and the use of our prostate, it’s more about using it as a means to reach these heightened states of pleasure and orgasm. When I was young, stuffing my ass with these foreign objects (that were maybe potentially harmful) I thought that I was doing something wrong and should feel ashamed, when the truth is, I was experimenting, exploring and I would soon learn in my later years that this was completely normal, healthy and something that all men should do, even if just once. Don’t be ashamed, be acclaimed.
The most interesting non-vibrating prostate stimulator, in my opinion, is the Aneros. Available in its original all-plastic design or in its improved soft silicone version. On its own, the Aneros won’t make you cum, but its presence on the prostate as you cum magnifies the intensity of your orgasm. (Note that some people can actually make themselves cum by anal contraction alone using the Aneros…) [In the picture underneath, the red line shows where the anus will be when the device is in place, while the circle (non-proportionate) shows the prostate.] The most interesting vibrating prostate stimulator, in my opinion, is the Naughty Boy by Rocks-Off. Because it vibrates, and because of its shape, it can make you cum on its own. The apparently weird C-shape of the Naughty Boy allows the device to act on the prostate via the anal “finger” and through the perineum. The C-Shape also allows the Naughty Boy to hold in place, whatever position you’re in. [In the picture underneath, the red line shows where the anus will be when the device is in place, while the circle (non-proportionate) shows the prostate.] If you ask, I suppose it is because you are not attracted to traditional dildos (hence my suggestions above), otherwise traditional dildos will perfectly do the job if you are aroused by anal dilation. Everybody knows what a dildo looks like. They are mostly interchangeable, except that some are wider than others : chose according to taste. The fact that a dildo or a prostate stimulator looks or not like a penis has no impact on your pleasure. Unless, of course, this is important for your arousal.
Somehow similar to Dildos, Prostate Stimulators are toys specifically intended to practice prostate massage. There are many of these devices on the market, and usually all of the resemble a bent finger, specifically targeted in stimulating the prostate area.
In the image on the side, is an example of an easy to find device that is widely available on the market.
Some of these prostate stimulators may also carry a vibrating add on, which in some cases can increase the arousal experience.
We’ve already touched the prostate massaging. So I guess here there’s just a bit more to explain. First of all when you choose a similar device, take into consideration your sizes. I suggest you use first a finger to understand how deep you have to reach to “touch” your prostate, and then choose according to this.
Many of the Prostate Stimulators nowadays also stimulate the perineum, and some of them can be used by simply inserting them inside and leaving them there while engaging in some other activities (like jerking off).
Believe it or not, some straight men like having their butts played with. In fact, more than a few of them are into anal penetration. But that doesn’t mean they are gay.
Stay with me here because what you’ll learn may surprise you.
In recent years, a topic has been bubbling up within the heterosexual community about the practice of pegging. Are you familiar with this term? If not, I’ll quickly explain below.
Pegging involves a dynamic where a man who identifies as straight likes being anally penetrated with a strap on. Typically, their female partners act as the “top”.
Because of long standing forms of homophobia within the wider culture, many assume that if a man likes anything near his anus, like a finger or toy, he “must” be gay.
It’s simply not true.
For the very reasons gay bottom men enjoy being topped, some straight men like getting “pegged”. This makes sense when you consider that a gay man’s butt is anatomically the same as a straight man’s.
The key difference is that gay men are just more open about these kinds of topics. Make sense?
Here are 3 things to keep in mind:
1. The male “G” spot is in the prostate
The prostate gland is surrounded by a bundle of nerves. When properly stimulated, they can cause extreme arousal. They aren’t “gay nerves” either. Instead, it’s male anatomy – purse and simple.
2. Some straight guys are curious about “backdoor”
Within gaydom, we simply call it topping or bottoming. But in straight-world, it’s called going “backdoor”. That’s code for anal penetration. And you know what? Some straight men are curious about what their girlfriends feel and are willing to switch positions.
But here’s the thing. They’ll never say they got f*cked. Instead, they simply say they sampled “backdoor”. See how that works? In this way, it’s very similar to the recent phenomenon called “Dude Sex”.
I guess we're all different, so I'll share my own experience. For me, this is a no brainer. By far, the position that works best for me is lying on my back. Often, this will be with my partner standing beside the bed, and he pulls my butt to the edge and enters. sometimes its legs up on his shoulders, but I really like it when I can wrap my legs around him. It really stimulates the prostate for me, and this is the only position in which I've had prostate orgasms, that is, orgasms without having to be touched at all on my p.
Well it seems that for most people on here the best position would be on back with bum pointing towards the ceiling which is the position I am in when I can find my prostate on my own. But how exactly would he be able to adjust his angle to hit my prostate? I mean it's like the penis is flexible.
If his cock points upward when erect like (many guys) lying on your back with your legs up should be the best position. How big is his cock? Thicker cocks rub the prostate more for obvious reasons. :icon_wink
If it points straight out lie face down on the bed and let him hump you.
Positions for Prostate Milking
If you're finding your prostate a little hard to locate or it's difficult to achieve consistent stimulation, try one of these positions.
On your back, legs in the air: This position is good for partner play and inserting toys.
Bent over furniture: Find a table, chair or sofa back that's the right height and bend over to explore your prostate!
Lying on your side: Perfect for when you're in bed or on the sofa. Reach behind you or behind your legs to stimulate your prostate.
All fours: Get on hands and knees to make your prostate more accessible.
This position is great for strap-on penetration from your partner.
Prostate massage and prostate milking are terms used to describe the massage or stimulation of the prostate gland in males, either for medical or sexual purposes. The two terms are interchangeable, although “massage” is more frequently used when the purpose is relief of symptoms of chronic prostatitis, and “milking” when the purpose is the reduction of sexual activity or drive through removal of prostatic fluid.
The prostate is a part of male sexual response, and a key contributor to male orgasm. Located adjacent to the rectum, it can be stimulated manually. Seminal fluids collected in the prostate are released during orgasm.
Prostate massage thus refers to any action which stimulates the gland. Prostate milking more usually refers to the specific practice of relieving the buildup of seminal fluids within the prostate, and discharging them by means of massage without orgasm or ejaculation. Done internally either by finger(s), prostate massager or other medical instrument, prostate massage may result in orgasm without any genital stimulation. It can also be indirectly massaged externally through the perineum, although this may not be effective in the removal of fluid.
How does prostate massage helps?
There are some health risks associated with prostate massage if performed incorrectly.
Gentle massage may “help to drain painfully sequestered secretions in a chronically [but not acutely] inflamed prostate gland or seminal vesicles”, and the massage around the prostate may benefit the muscles there.
Vigorous massage, or massage to an acute prostatitis case, in some cases may be dangerous, possibly leading to septicaemia (blood poisoning), transfer of prostate cancer to other parts of the body, or hemorrhoidal flare-up in some individuals.
Whilst a prostate massage can benefit some men, it is important to be aware that there are risks involved with massaging a prostate that is suffering from an ailment or using too much force.
Who can do prostate massage?
You can massage your prostate by simply inserting your finger into the anus and reaching back and up towards the navel until you feel the prostate gland. Use natural-content personal lubricant of the type specific to this purpose (available in drug stores) to facilitate insertion of the finger, and gently rub back and forth on the prostate using as much pressure as you can without causing pain.
This massage can be made even more pleasurable if your partner is willing to do the massage for you. You need not concern yourself about about bacterial transmission if the hands are clean.
Traditionally, doctors would massage their patients’ prostates regularly to cure or prevent disease. Now, however, most doctors only check the prostate, and if they find a problem prefer to cut it out or prescribe medication. But a doctor is not necessarily required for prostate massage. You can do it yourself or have your partner do it for you. Try this practice and discover its health benefits. When you do it yourself, you can be very gentle and make the treatment pleasurable as well as efficacious.
Some people have a psychological block against examining or massaging their prostates. They think the anus is dirty. But there is nothing dirty about the body, which must be cared for. The only thing that might be considered dirty is disease; and these practices are intended to prevent and cure disease through regular care for the entire body, including the anus and prostate.
Many men are troubled by these massages because they think there is something “homosexual” about it, especially if it is pleasurable. They might feel differently if they knew the extent to which neglect ultimately results in prostate dysfunction, malfunction, and disease. Inserting a finger into the anus never turned anyone into a homosexual
It is important that men examine themselves often by checking the condition of their prostates. You can determine the condition of the prostate by feeling for changes in size and resilience. Check this as often as possible, at least weekly, and you will be able to establish a standard for yourself. By doing so, you will be able to detect any changes in the size and flexibility of your prostate.
A very hard, enlarged, or painful prostate is an indication of a disorder that could lead to cancer or some other major problem. However, prostate disorders do not develop overnight, and regular massage can prevent and reverse problems.
Medical science accepts that it is normal for men over the age of fifty to experience problems with their prostates. Although prostate problems may be common, they are not normal. They are abnormal.
There is no need for any man to have prostate problems. With regular examination and massage and practice of the Deer Exercise, prostate problems may never occur at all.
An alternative to this is the Deer Exercise achieves four important objectives. First, it builds up the tissues of the sexual organs. Second, it draws energy up through six of the Seven Glands of the body into the pineal gland to elevate spirituality. (There is a hormone pathway that leads from the prostate, connects with the adrenal glands, and continues on to the other glands.) Concurrently, blood circulation in the abdominal area is increased. This rush of blood helps transport the nutrients and energy of the semen to the rest of the body.
This exercise may be done standing, sitting, or lying down.
First Stage
The purpose of the first stage is to encourage semen production.
Rub the palms of your hands together vigorously. This creates heat in your hands by bringing the energy of your body into your hands and palms.
With your right hand, cup your testicles so that the palm of your hand completely covers them. (The exercise is best done without clothing.) Do not squeeze, but apply a slight pressure, and be aware of the heat from your hand.
Place the palm of your left hand on the area of the pubis, one inch below the navel.
With a slight pressure so that a gentle warmth begins to build in the area of the pubis, move your left hand in clockwise or counterclockwise circles eighty-one times.
Rub your hands together vigorously again.
Reverse the position of your hands so that your hleft hand cups the testicles and your right hand is on the pubis. Repeat the circular rubbing in the opposite direction another eighty-one times. Concentrate on what you are doing, and feel the warmth grow. For all Taoist exercises, it is very important — indeed, it is necessary — that you concentrate on the purpose of the physical motions, for doing so will enhance the results. It will unify the body and mind and bring full power to the purpose. Never try to use the mind to force the natural processes by imagining fires growing in the public area, or any other area. This is dangerous.
Second Stage
Tighten the muscles around the anus and draw them up and in. When done properly, it will feel as if air is being drawn up to your rectum, or as if the entire anal area is being drawn in and upward. Tighten as hard as you can and hold as long as you are able to do so comfortably.
Stop and relax a moment.
Repeat the anal contractions. Do this as many times as you can without feeling discomfort.
As you do the second stage of the exercise, concentrate on feeling a tingling sensation (similar to an electric shock) ascend along the pathway of the Seven Glands. The sensation lasts for fractions of a second and results naturally. Do not try to force this with mental images.
Some teachings suggest that thoughts should be used to help or guide energy flow. Those who make these suggestions misunderstand the nature of energy.
Stimulating the Prostate to Orgasm (I): General Advice
Before we start, however, let me emphasize that one should not expect too much too soon. For many men,* and especially straight men, the sorts of sensations you will be experiencing when you start to stimulate your prostate will be unusual, and it will take time to learn what feels best to you, and what kinds of stimulation are most effective. If you’re not used to being penetrated anally, just adjusting to that sensation can take a while. So be patient with yourself. There are a lot of enjoyable feelings to be had here, even short of prostate orgasms.
Second, if you are going to play with your butt, then you are eventually going to run into a bit of poop. Usually, it will be just a tiny bit, and it isn’t that big a deal, but it’s not the most pleasant aspect of anal sex. Still, if the very idea of running into a bit of poop freaks you out, then butt play is probably not for you. It will be difficult to relax and focus on what you are feeling.
I tend to confine my anal play to the afternoons or evenings, as my rectum tends to be cleaner then, and to avoid anal play on days when things aren’t quite right down there. Very often, though not always, I’ll clean myself out before I get to playing. It feels good, and it makes it easier for things to move around inside you if there’s nothing blocking their way. Many people already have an appropriate device for this purpose. A lot of hot water bottles double as enema delivery systems. Most drugstores carry these if you don’t have one, and there are several simpler devices available as well, often advertised as anal douches.
You will want to use plenty of lube, since the anus and rectum are not naturally lubricated in any way. How much you need will depend upon what sort of play you are engaged in. If it involves in-and-out, thrusting motions, then you need more than if it involves just putting something inside yourself and leaving it there. Either way, however, you want to lubricate yourself inside and outside. For the inside part, I have found that a small syringe works perfectly. (Without a needle, of course!) You can fill it with lube, and then squirt it inside yourself. But whatever you use (and do make sure that it is appropriate to any toy you may be using, e.g., don’t use silicone lube with silicone toys), double check that it does not have any sharp edges. Ouch! And not in a good way, either. You can’t wish yourself into having orgasms, so when it’s time to play and experiment, try to get yourself into a nice, relaxed, comfortable mood. Have a shower first, or a warm bath. You can massage your anus a bit, to start enjoying those sensations, while you get nice and clean. It’ll make your skin extra-sensitive, as well. And when you do start playing, try not to go right for the prize. That will only frustrate you. You have to learn a new way of having an orgasm, and that means you have to unlearn a lot of what you think you know about your body.
Most men’s sexuality is very centered on their penis. If you want to learn to have prostate orgasms, then one of the most important things you need to do is decouple your sexuality from your penis. You have to learn to let sensations from other parts of your body be the ones that drive you to orgasmic bliss. So stimulate your nipples. Stroke your stomach and the inside of your thighs. Massage the cheeks of your ass. Massage your anus. Delight in all of these sensations, just for what they are, and not for anything they might bring. If you’re used to watching porn while you masturbate, give that a rest. Watch porn beforehand, if you like, or read some erotica, or whatever. Once you start playing, you will need to give your full attention to the sensations you will be experiencing. Your body is a wondrous thing. You are learning something wonderfully new about it. Honor that.
You are probably used to having an erection when you are aroused. But you may not get one from prostate stimulation. Or you may have one before you start and then lose it once you do. It does not matter. Your penis is not part of this experience. Until you understand this, you will not be able to have prostate orgasms.
You are probably used to doing something to cum. You are probably accustomed, as you near orgasm, to moving faster, pushing harder. Give that a rest, too. If you try to do something here, you will fail. You have to relax and just let it happen. As your arousal grows, focus on the feelings emanating from deep inside your body. Ignore your penis. Instead, focus on your breath, as if you are meditating. This can be a great way to focus your mind on what is happening inside you. It is inside you where the action will be, which is very different from how most men (especially most straight men) are used to experiencing sexual pleasure. But remember to breathe, even if you do not do it mindfully.
And remember: All of our bodies are different. I can tell you what has worked for me. But your body is not my body. Your intimate anatomy is different from mine. Your prostate has a different shape. It lies at a different place inside you. It is more or less sensitive than mine. It will take time for you to learn how to have prostate orgasms. Or maybe your body doesn’t work that way at all. Maybe your body orgasms in ways mine does not. It’s all good. Everything is normal.
Manual Stimulation
The obvious way to start exploring your prostate is by inserting a finger or two into your anus. And, indeed, this is not a bad way to begin. There are all kinds of wonderful feelings to be had from this kind of play. The anus is full of nerve endings, especially right inside the anal ring, and penetrating yourself with your fingers is a good way to get used to how it feels to have something inside your ass.
You can also get an initial sense this way of where your prostate is, and what it feels like when it is stimulated. You’ll find it on the front wall of the rectum. It feels much harder than the surrounding tissue, kind of like a walnut.
Once you’ve located your prostate, then what you want to do, basically, is massage it. Use a firm but gentle pressure, and experiment with up and down movements, side to side movements, circles, or maybe just tapping it. Don’t be shy! It’s sensitive, and delicate, but you are not likely to hurt it with your fingers. So do whatever comes to mind, but always start out slow, and stop if it hurts.
When you first start doing this, it will feel strange, and it may take some time before you figure out what feels best to you. Experiment, and keep an open mind. You may feel like you need to pee. This is normal. You probably don’t need to pee, but your prostate is very near your bladder, and your urethra passes through your prostate. You are probably just confusing this new sensation with one familiar to you. But have a good pee before you start, if that will make you more comfortable.
If you have a partner with whom to engage in this kind of play, you may find manual stimulation to be quite effective. Honestly, though, I do not find this to be a very good way to achieve prostate orgasms on my own. I tend to treat it more as a very pleasurable sort of foreplay. (Did you know you can have foreplay while masturbating?) My fingers are not long enough to reach more than the very front of my prostate. Even getting my fingers far enough into my ass to stimulate the front portion of my prostate is somewhat uncomfortable. I usually try to roll my hips forward to make access easier, but I find that my wrist gets very sore very quickly. The most comfortable position is on my side, and I reach around behind myself and put my thumb into my ass. This allows me to stimulate the anterior part of my prostate quite firmly and effectively, but it is very much limited to that part of the prostate. I’ve only been able to orgasm from that kind of stimulation a few times, and usually only when I’d already have several other prostate orgasms.
Still, as I said, this kind of play can be very pleasurable, whether it leads to orgasm or not. Try using a latex or nitrile glove. I find that very sexy, and it is much smoother than a bare hand. It makes clean up easy, too.
So, manual stimulation isn’t that effective for me. In the next post, then,, I’ll talk about some other ways to stimulate the prostate that work better.
Stimulating the Prostate to Orgasm (II): Probes, Prostate Massagers, and Vibrators
In the first post in this series, I gave some general advice about how to approach learning to have prostate orgasms and talked about the easiest way to try to stimulate the prostate: manually. In this post, I will talk about the use of probes, prostate massagers, and vibrators.
Probes
The idea here is very simple. We want to use some sort of device to reach the prostate and massage it for sexual stimulation, both comfortably and effectively, thus solving the problem of fingers that are too short.
The prostate is on the front wall of the rectum. So, if you are playing by yourself, and lying on your back, then, after you have inserted your toy, you will have to push it away from you in order to force it up against your prostate. Or else you will have to reach around behind yourself and kind of pull it towards your back. These are not the most comfortable positions.
It is therefore very nice if the toy has a shape that helps get it into contact with the prostate. Many toys designed for prostate stimulation do have some sort of curve to them, for this reason. But I find that these ‘curves’ usually are not sufficient really to solve the problem. This may be because 'prostate’ toys very often begin life as g-spot toys, and, while there are similarities between the g-spot and the p-spot, there are also important differences. The most important, in the present context, is that the vagina is (obviously) more toward the front of the body than the anus. It is therefore a lot easier to manipulate a toy inserted into the vagina than one inserted into the anus.
I’ll come right out and say that the NJoy Pure Wand is the best thing I have ever found for this purpose. It has a nice, one inch ball on one end, a larger, inch and a half, ball on the other end, and a graceful curve along the way that narrows to about half an inch in the middle. It is made of metal, so it is extremely rigid. Either ball works well for insertion, and even the smaller one is large enough to stimulate a good portion of the prostate. The other end works as a handle, and the Pure Wand is long enough that it is easy to manipulate without having to double oneself over. It also helps a lot that it is narrow in the middle. This makes extended use more comfortable, and gives very little resistance to movement at the point of entry.
The Pure Wand is expensive, no doubt, and not everyone will be able to afford one. But I’ve used other toys designed as g-spot dildos, such as the Tantus G-Force, and many of them have worked just fine. Look for something fairly long and, preferably, fairly rigid. If it’s too flexible, as silicone toys usually are, you won’t be able to apply enough pressure to the prostate.
Again, what we are looking to do is to massage the prostate, more or less. You will be using a toy to do it, but the options are much the same as with fingers, as described in the previous post. One wants to hold the toy so that it puts a firm but gentle pressure on the prostate and then to move the toy around, in and out, side to side, in circles, or what have you. The movements need only be very slight. We’re not talking about thrusting movements, but much smaller ones, certainly no more than an inch in any direction. The key is really to establish a rhythm and then to maintain it as your arousal grows.
You may well find that different parts of the prostate are more or less sensitive. The most sensitive part of mine seems to be the part that is deepest inside me. I can almost always reach orgasm by massaging that part. But it also feels good to massage the front, and I can sometimes reach a slightly different sort of orgasm that way. That is easiest, though, once I’ve had a few orgasms in some other way, and my body is aflame already.
Prostate Massagers
The first device I found that was able to give me prostate orgasms reliably was the original Aneros prostate massager. I have since used similar devices made by other companies. They can take some practice to master, but it is the best kind of practice.
Prostate massagers, as I am using the term, are “passive” devices, by which I mean that they do not use batteries, and they are not directly manipulated by the user. Instead, they are powered by the user’s body, in a way I shall try to describe.
Massagers of this kind basically consist of two parts. There is a “finger” that is meant to be inserted into the rectum. The finger is usually curved and is just long enough that, when the toy is in place, the tip of the finger rests against the prostate. There is also what is usually described as a “perineum stimulator”, which remains outside the body and comes into contact with the user’s perineum (the bit between the genitals and the anus). The real purpose of this part of the toy, though, is to anchor the toy against the body.
Think of the prostate massager, then, as a little lever, with the fulcrum being where the perineum tab rests against the body. If you were to press on the base of the toy, where the “finger” enters the anus, and then release the pressure, the toy would move in and then out, but as it did so it would also rotate around the fulcrum. As a result, the tip of the finger would press upon the prostate, while simultaneously moving over it, and then it would move back over it when the pressure was released. If you were to do this over and over, you would be massaging the prostate.
Prostate massagers can be used manually in precisely this way. This is made easier if they have a handle, which most of them do. I have found moving the handle in a little circle to be very effective. Note that this is something a partner can do, as well.
But there are other, more effective ways to operate these devices. I would recommend starting with what is sometimes called the “clench and release” method. Once the device has been inserted, clench down on the toy, contracting your PC muscles, much as you would while doing Kegel exercises. And then release the muscles. Contracting pulls the toy into the rectum, just as if you were pushing on its base; releasing lets the toy fall back again. Doing this rhythmically thus massages the prostate, just as if you were manipulating the toy with your hand.
This sort of exercise gets the blood flowing and helps prepare the body for the most advanced of the available techniques. With this method, one again contracts the PC muscles, but not all the way. Rather, one tries to contract them just half way, and then tries to hold that position. It is impossible to hold the PC muscles at half contraction, but that is the point. The muscles kind of 'flutter’, contracting and releasing of their own accord, which causes the tip of the massager to sort of dance over the prostate, as if by magic. The sensations this produces are incredible, and they typically bring me to orgasm within a couple minutes. Subsequent orgasms tend to come more quickly, and to last longer, and I can have as many as ten or fifteen orgasms this way.
As I said, it takes time to learn how to do this. It may well be like nothing you have ever felt before. Your body and mind are accustomed to reaching orgasm in a completely different way. As you become more aroused, you may want to clench down harder. Resist that temptation. Do not try to reach for the orgasm. Let it come to you. And when it starts, let the pulsing contractions of your orgasm take over the movements of the massager, and just ride it out.
It’s worth trying different toys of this type, too, such as those from Nexus. The different sizes and shapes produce very different sorts of experiences. Some have not worked for me at all, because they don’t seem to fit my internal anatomy very well. The most surprising one that did is the Pure Wand, which is very heavy, but still can be used as a prostate massager. So don’t give up if it doesn’t seem to happen for you at first. Keep trying.
The first device I found that was able to give me prostate orgasms reliably was the original Aneros prostate massager. I have since used similar devices made by other companies. They can take some practice to master, but it is the best kind of practice.
Prostate massagers, as I am using the term, are “passive” devices, by which I mean that they do not use batteries, and they are not directly manipulated by the user. Instead, they are powered by the user’s body, in a way I shall try to describe.
Massagers of this kind basically consist of two parts. There is a “finger” that is meant to be inserted into the rectum. The finger is usually curved and is just long enough that, when the toy is in place, the tip of the finger rests against the prostate. There is also what is usually described as a “perineum stimulator”, which remains outside the body and comes into contact with the user’s perineum (the bit between the genitals and the anus). The real purpose of this part of the toy, though, is to anchor the toy against the body.
Think of the prostate massager, then, as a little lever, with the fulcrum being where the perineum tab rests against the body. If you were to press on the base of the toy, where the “finger” enters the anus, and then release the pressure, the toy would move in and then out, but as it did so it would also rotate around the fulcrum. As a result, the tip of the finger would press upon the prostate, while simultaneously moving over it, and then it would move back over it when the pressure was released. If you were to do this over and over, you would be massaging the prostate.
Prostate massagers can be used manually in precisely this way. This is made easier if they have a handle, which most of them do. I have found moving the handle in a little circle to be very effective. Note that this is something a partner can do, as well.
But there are other, more effective ways to operate these devices. I would recommend starting with what is sometimes called the “clench and release” method. Once the device has been inserted, clench down on the toy, contracting your PC muscles, much as you would while doing Kegel exercises. And then release the muscles. Contracting pulls the toy into the rectum, just as if you were pushing on its base; releasing lets the toy fall back again. Doing this rhythmically thus massages the prostate, just as if you were manipulating the toy with your hand.
This sort of exercise gets the blood flowing and helps prepare the body for the most advanced of the available techniques. With this method, one again contracts the PC muscles, but not all the way. Rather, one tries to contract them just half way, and then tries to hold that position. It is impossible to hold the PC muscles at half contraction, but that is the point. The muscles kind of 'flutter’, contracting and releasing of their own accord, which causes the tip of the massager to sort of dance over the prostate, as if by magic. The sensations this produces are incredible, and they typically bring me to orgasm within a couple minutes. Subsequent orgasms tend to come more quickly, and to last longer, and I can have as many as ten or fifteen orgasms this way.
As I said, it takes time to learn how to do this. It may well be like nothing you have ever felt before. Your body and mind are accustomed to reaching orgasm in a completely different way. As you become more aroused, you may want to clench down harder. Resist that temptation. Do not try to reach for the orgasm. Let it come to you. And when it starts, let the pulsing contractions of your orgasm take over the movements of the massager, and just ride it out.
It’s worth trying different toys of this type, too, such as those from Nexus. The different sizes and shapes produce very different sorts of experiences. Some have not worked for me at all, because they don’t seem to fit my internal anatomy very well. The most surprising one that did is the Pure Wand, which is very heavy, but still can be used as a prostate massager. So don’t give up if it doesn’t seem to happen for you at first. Keep trying.
Vibrators
Using a vibrator can be a very effective way to stimulate the prostate.
There are many vibrators that are made specifically for prostate stimulation. Many of these are 'male’ versions of g-spot toys, often coming in different colors: black instead of pink. (Enough with the gender stereotypes!) Some of them are specifically designed for use by people with prostates. But almost any vibrator that is long enough to reach the prostate can be tried. Since you will be inserting this into your rectum, however, the usual safety tips apply. The toy should have a wide, flanged base so that you cannot lose it inside yourself. And you probably do not want anything too rough.
Multiple speeds, patterns, and so forth are all nice features in any vibrator. But there are a couple things I have found are particularly important with prostate vibrators.
First, the vibrating mechanism should be where the toy comes into contact with the prostate. That makes the vibrations maximally effective. Unfortunately, however, way too many prostate toys have the vibrator at the base, where it remains outside the body. As a result, much of the vibration tends to be absorbed or otherwise lost before it ever gets to the prostate, which will make the toy less effective than it should be.
Second, it is important to get the vibrator firmly into contact with the prostate. If it just sits in the rectum, the soft tissues surrounding it will absorb most of the vibration, and, once again, little of it will get to where it needs to go.
We have the same problem with vibrators, then, that we have with probes and similar toys: Unless the toy has the right kind of curve, getting it into firm contact with the prostate can be very difficult if you are not a contortionist. Many prostate vibrators do have a bit of a curve, but that doesn’t always help as much as it should. Either the curve isn’t dramatic enough, or there isn’t enough of a handle so that one can direct the vibrator where one wants it to go, or who knows what other problems one encounters.
There is at least one vibrator, however, that is perfectly designed in this respect. I am talking about the Duke Click-n-Charge vibrator, from Fun Factory. It has an almost scary looking shape to it, but the shape does the job, for several reasons. The bulb in the middle is what comes into contact with the prostate, and the girth of the toy, together with the extension at the end, provides some internal pressure to keep it where it needs to be. The little loop at the base, which remains outside the body, works somewhat like the perineum tab on a massager, again helping to force the vibrator up against the prostate.
There’s not a whole lot to using these things. Basically, you just insert the toy, manipulate it until it is in firm contact with the prostate, hold it there, and let it do its thing. That said, there are many different places that one can put the vibrator, exactly: on the front portion of the prostate, on the back portion, in the middle or on one of the sides, and so forth. If one place isn’t working, try another one. I often have the experience of moving a vibrator around and then, suddenly, it just hits the right spot, and I know I’ll be cumming any moment.
If the vibrator has a curve, try using it curved up and curved down. The Billy vibrator from Lelo vibrator, for example, clearly seems intended to be used with the tip curving up towards the prostate, and that works very well indeed. But it can also be used the other way around. Used that way, more of the vibrator seems to be in contact with the prostate, though the vibrations are then a little more diffuse. It’s a different kind of orgasm, but a very pleasant one just the same.
Stimulating the Prostate to Orgasm III: Dildos and Thrusting
In the first post in this series, I gave some general advice about how to approach learning to have prostate orgasms and talked about manual stimulation of the prostate. In the second post, I talked about the virtues of probes, prostate massagers, and vibrators. In this, the third and last post, I will discuss the use of dildos.
Dildos and Thrusting
A way of stimulating the prostate that is very different from the other techniques I’ve discussed is, basically, to fuck yourself. Achieving prostate orgasm this way is something I only learned to do long after I’d learned to do it other ways, though, as always, Your Mileage May Vary. But I’m glad I learned to do it this way. It’s a particularly interesting sort of orgasm, since the penetration and thrusting cause so many other sensations at the same time.
The difference between this method and the use of probes, which I described in a previous article, is that, in that case, there is not a lot of thrusting. Much of the time, using the NJoy Pure Wand, for example, I am more rocking it back and forth than moving it in and out, so there is not much stimulation of the sensitive tissues around the anus, but only of the prostate. What I have in mind here, on the other hand, is a form of play that is much more focused on the in-and-out, and so where there will be a lot of stimulation of the anal ring.
Just how much size one wants is very much a personal decision. But here again, it is important to be able to move the dildo in and out in a regular, rhythmic way, so you want something fairly comfortable. And you need a lot of lube, though how much you will need depends very much on what toy you use. More on that in a moment.
Simply inserting a dildo and moving it in and out will not stimulate the prostate very much. The prostate is on the front wall of the rectum, so a dildo that is pointing directly into the rectum is mostly going to miss it. To stimulate the prostate this way, then, you have to get the dildo to rub up against, or back and forth over, the prostate. And to do that, you will usually have to angle the outer end of the dildo away from the front of your body, so that the part of the dildo inside you will be pointed toward the prostate.
This angle can be difficult to get right. If it is too steep, then the front end of the dildo will hit the prostate too directly, which is at best uncomfortable and at worst painful. If the angle is too shallow, then you will not get enough pressure against the prostate. More than with any other technique, then, you will need to experiment, pretty much every time, until you find the correct angle, and it may not always be the same one. What works best for me is when I can find an angle that allows the dildo, with each thrust into me, to sort of bounce off the prostate, the tip of the dildo bumping against it and then the body of the toy gliding along it, and then reversing the process as the dildo moves back out of me.
The right sort of dildo will make all the difference here. I have found silicone dildos generally to be good for this use. On the other hand, I find that silicone toys never get really slippery, even with a great lube. Or, if they do get slippery, they won’t stay that way. The most slippery lubes are silicone-based, but of course you cannot use a silicone-based lube with a silicone dildo )unless you want to melt it(. Using a condom on the dildo helps a lot, in my experience, and of course it makes clean up easier, too.
There is no particular need for a silicone dildo to be curved. Too dramatic a curve will interfere with the in-and-out sort of motion you are trying to achieve. Since silicone dildos tend to be flexible, you can aim them right at the prostate, and they will not hit it too hard: They will kind of bump into it, then flex and move along it, and yet they are rigid enough not just to get pushed away from the prostate. But a mild curve can be useful, as can a good-sized handle. Remember, too, that any device used for anal penetration should have some kind of ‘flange’ at the base so that it does not get lost inside you.
Doing this solo, it can sometimes be difficult to find a comfortable position that will allow me both to achieve the right angle of penetration and to get enough force behind the thrusts to make for a truly satisfying fucking. If I’m lying on my back, it is nearly impossible to reach down far enough to angle the dildo the right way, even if I angle my hips upward using, say, a pillow. Doggy style works a bit better, since, when I put my arm behind myself to grab the dildo, that naturally pulls it up towards my back and so helps achieve the right angle. But with one hand on the dildo, I have only one arm to support myself, which can quickly become tiring. What often works best is if I lie on my side, and then reach around behind myself. This is an easy position to maintain. Prone )that is, simply lying on my stomach( can work well, too.
When I get the rhythm right, this is a wonderful way to play. I can use a shallow angle for a while, just screwing myself without worrying about my prostate. This feels fantastic by itself—as I’ve mentioned before, the tissues around the anus are exquisitely sensitive—and it increases my arousal until I am ready for an orgasm. At that point, I can change the angle to one that does stimulate my prostate, have an orgasm, go back to screwing myself until I’m ready for another orgasm, and so forth.
Glass Dildos
I have recently started to use glass dildos as well as silicone ones. I love how solid and weighty they feel, and it doesn’t hurt how incredibly beautiful some of them are, either. But the main thing is how smooth and slippery they are, even without a lot of lube )though you will, of course, always need some(. One thing to watch out for here is that you probably don’t want a lot of texture on a glass dildo )as with, say the Icicles #5 or #29(. My anus, at least, does not respond well to rough treatment, and while slow movement of something with some texture can feel nice, too much texture is irritating, at best.
Icicles #22
A gentle curve, on the other hand, is almost essential with glass toys. The Icicles #22, for example, has a nice “bubble” at the tip, but it can be difficult to get it to contact the prostate in the right way, because it is hard to get the angle of penetration right. And because the dildo is so rigid, if the angle is too deep, then it will hit the prostate too hard. Ouch! That said, if all you want is to get fucked but good, then a nice, straight dildo like the #22 is just the ticket.
Contrast dildos like the Icicles #17 and #21. The curve here makes them almost perfect for prostate stimulation. If you hold the dildo at a natural angle—just as it sits, on its own, in your rectum, with the curve pointing up towards your stomach—and then move it in and out, the curve rocks the head of the dildo back and forth. As it enters you, the bulb at the end of the dildo is forced against the prostate, moving over it as penetration continues, and then it pulls out along the prostate again as the dildo slides out of you, all in all providing quite a wonderful experience. My prostate, at least, especially appreciates the “moving out” part. With many different toys, I find that one of the most pleasurable sensations is when the tip of the toy kind of loops around the posterior portion of the prostate, and then presses against it as the toy is withdrawn, almost as if it is pulling on my prostate.
Icicles #17
My only complaint about the #17 is that the ball at the end is almost 1.5″ wide, and there is no taper at all, so it can be a bit difficult for me to insert it. I have to warm myself up a fair bit, whereas the #21, though not much smaller, is much easier to insert, due to the tapered tip.
Glass vs silicone involves some trade-offs, and I feel different ways about it different days. Because silicone dildos are flexible, I find that I’m able to fuck myself much harder with them, and still achieve good stimulation of the prostate, than I can with one of the glass ones. It is, as I’ve already intimated, too easy to hurt yourself with something so hard and rigid. So be careful!
By the way, I should perhaps add that curved dildos have a tendency to want to turn themselves around the wrong way, so that the curve is pointing away from the prostate. So you may sometimes need to check which way around it is.
Finally, much of what I have said about glass dildos should also apply to metal ones, though I have not myself used a metal dildo, so can’t speak from first-hand experience.
Going Hands-Free
No doubt, penetrative, thrusting stimulation of the prostate is easier if you have a partner who can manipulate the dildo for you, though I confess I have never had that pleasure. And, obviously, if you have a partner who is prepared to wear a dildo, or one who has a fleshy penis of their own, then you have all kinds of additional possibilities to explore. But I have not had those pleasures, either, so I will not comment on them.
Still, there are other ways to go “hands free”. There are plenty of “fucking machines” to which you can mount a dildo, and the machine will then move it back and forth, for automated fucking. Unfortunately, these machines tend to be fairly expensive, as in $500 or more. I’ve had some luck, though, mounting a dildo to something rigid and then moving my body. Some years ago, for example, I had a vibrating dildo that had died. So I took out the vibrating mechanism from the base and mounted what was left on the end of a broomstick, or something of the sort, which I then was able to wedge under my mattress firmly enough that it would not move when I did. I could then get on my hands and knees, insert the dildo, and rock myself back and forth so that the dildo would go in and out of me. This is good for simulating intercourse, but it can be hard to get a good angle for stimulation of the prostate.
Similarly, many harnesses can be mounted on pillows, or wrapped around sofa cushions, or what have you, and a dildo can then be attached to them. Harnesses that are designed to mount on the thigh, such as the Outlaw Fix, are a good choice here, and I actually have a “harness”, with extremely long straps, that was specifically designed to mount on a couch cushion, or an ottoman, or whatever, but I’ve not seen such a thing advertised for several years.
There are also various sorts of sex furniture that will accept a dildo, such as the Liberator BonBon, and these can be used as well. The BonBon does not work so well for serious thrusting, however, as there tends to be too much ‘play’ in this kind of setup. That is, it moves too much when I do, since the BonBon is pretty light, and there is nothing holding it down. )I suspect this is more of a problem when using the BonBon for anal penetration than when using it for vaginal penetration, since most vaginas don’t “grip” nearly so firmly as most anuses.( But I have had some luck using rope, or something of the sort, to secure the BonBon to my bed.
Instead of thrusting, there is another technique you might also try, one that has sometimes worked very well for me. Using the BonBon, or a similar setup, I insert the dildo as far as it will go and then rock my hips back and forth over it. This causes some slight in-and-out movement, but mostly it effects a kind of prostate massage, pushing the body of the dildo against the prostate as my hips rock back, then releasing the pressure as they rock forward, and so forth, over and over. This is a nice, ‘active’ way to play, and it can give your hips quite a workout, as well as lead to some very pleasant orgasms.
Experiment with where your ‘resting’ position is. If you move your entire body forward a bit, so that the base of the dildo moves back, then the part that is inside you will move toward the front of your body, i.e., towards your prostate. If you move your body back, then the dildo moves away from your prostate. This allows another degree of control over the amount of pressure that will be applied when you rock your hips.
Conclusion
There are several different ways to stimulate the prostate so as to bring about prostate orgasms. Not all of these methods will work for everyone, but all of them have worked for me, at least at some time or other, though even now some of them are more reliable than others. No one can know what will work for you and, as I have said, it will take time to learn how to orgasm in a new way. Only through practice and experimentation can you find what does and does not work for your particular body.
If you’re wondering whether to start trying, though, then let me just say this: You do not know what you are missing. If you did, you would not wonder; you would start right now. Prostate stimulation provides a kind and depth of sexual pleasure that is simply not available to people with prostates any other way, so far as I am aware. When was the last time you had fifteen orgasms in an hour?
