Beginner's Guide To Spanking

When it comes to BDSM and indeed a little bit of ‘slap and tickle’, it’s easy to see why spanking has become such a hit. Not only does it increase blood flow to the area in question, thereby making it more sensitive, it stimulates the nerve endings and releases waves of pleasurable endorphins. It also caters, somewhat satisfyingly, to the pain sluts and Dominants amongst us ;)

So, whether you want to ramp up your role play, awaken your inner adult baby, hone your humiliation play or set up your sensation play scene, you’ve come to the right place!

Safety First!

There’s no hiding from it, there are certain safety issues that need to be addressed prior to your impact play.

First of all, it is common for the bottom to acquire bruises as a result of their spanking. This is nothing to be concerned about; it is simply a consequence of blood vessels in the skin breaking. To limit swelling and reduce pain, treat the area with an ice pack for 20-30 minutes immediately after your scene has ended. Continue to do this 2-3 times daily for as long as required. Some people find that using Arnica or aloe vera gel helps to ease soreness and speed up the healing process. If bruises have not vanished after four weeks, please make an urgent appointment to see a doctor. This could be the result of more serious damage such as a strain or other muscle injury.

When spanking, there is always a slight risk of the skin breaking, particularly when using canes and other long range implements. As such, in this type of impact play, it is vital that precautionary measures are taken to avoid the spread of any blood borne diseases. If you plan to use with multiple partners, choose a tool made from non-porous material and make sure that it is thoroughly sanitised between each playtime. Additionally, it is essential to have a first aid kit nearby (complete with latex gloves and antibacterial cleaner). Most importantly of all, if deep cuts occur, stop immediately!

Finally, remember; too many blows to one place can be extremely painful. Try to alternate your target and frequency and always make sure the bottom has fully recovered before hitting them with round two.

Don’t:
  • Play if you have taken blood thinning medication, including Warfarin or Aspirin
  • Hit too hard or frequently
  • Obstruct breathing or circulation in any way
  • Strike the spine, or anywhere near the kidneys and other vital organs
  • Overdo it! We don’t want bottoms with ‘leather butt’ (when skin is toughened, scarred and desensitised over time)
Do:
  • Keep a first aid kit nearby
  • Monitor reactions and body language
  • Stick to more muscular or fatty areas such as the buttock and the back of the thighs
  • Test spanking tools prior to your play so that you are aware of the intensity
  • Practice on a sofa or a pillow to perfect aim
  • Go slowly – start with the hand and work your way up gradually
  • Agree on a safe word/action beforehand

Warm Up

We’re sure you’re getting pretty hot just thinking about your impact play! However, it’s vital that you don’t get too excited and start sticking it to them without a proper warm up. As with any physical activity, the body needs to be prepared for what it is about to endure. So, whether clothed or naked, it’s time to get that adrenaline and blood pumping!

First things first; which part of the body are you planning to spank? It may come as no surprise, but the UberKinky ‘sweet spot’ is right on the tushy! You can’t beat a good rear-ending, especially with the increased blood flow and stimulation to the nearby genital region. Although we do get a real kick out of spanking the back of the thighs form time to time. Others may prefer the hands, feet, shoulder blades or the breasts/pecs, but if you do decide on one of the latter, be sure to use a flogger and keep those hits swift and gentle.

Right, you’ve decided on your destination, but now what? Gently massage the area/s in a circular motion and squeeze the skin to increase blood flow. You may wish to warm the hands by rubbing them together first, that way you will avoid giving the bottom unwanted ‘chills’. Lightly rub/tickle the skin and then spank four times (on each buttock/hand/foot etc.) For spanking the buttocks slightly cup the hand and move in an upward motion, following each spank with some genital stimulation. End with a fifth, more forceful slap.

We’re sure you’ve made those cheeks blush a little, so let chastising commence!

Positions

There’s no doubt about it, spanking is about to make a great impact on your life! But are you really sure you know what you’re doing? Well fear not, UberKinky friends; that’s where we come in. After all, we don’t want you making any school boy/girl errors, do we?

So, when it comes to doling out your corporal punishment, first things first… assume the position! Choose a stance that is comfortable for you both. The more comfortable and relaxed the bottom is the longer that they will be able to withstand their punishment.

More traditional positions, including ‘over the knee’ and ‘lying down’ are perfect for short range implements and will allow the Dominant to get a greater force behind their swing. However, we recommend a restrained or standing position if your chosen ‘sweet spot’ is not on the buttocks. Flogging can be best enjoyed in an upright position, or restrained from a frame/cross.
There are many positions to be explored, but here are our UberKinky favourites;

Over the Knee (OTK) - You better follow UberKinky’s advice; otherwise we’ll put your over our knee! Okay, wrong audience ;) OTK is perhaps the most commonly used and popular of all the spanking positions. The bottom will lie sideways over the Top’s knee and await their fate. Ideal for those using short range implements, this position also allows for easy restraint using an arm or leg.

Lying Down - ‘Bottoms up’ everyone! An UberKinky frontrunner, this is one of the most comfortable and relaxing positions for spanking. Lying face down, usually on a bed, keeps the bottom on display making it perfect for humiliation play. For elevated pleasure that gives you both a real lift, try placing pillows beneath the hips. This is the UberKinky recommended beginner’s position.

Bent Over (furniture or touching knees/ankles) - Now we’re just bending over backwards to please you! This is an immensely popular choice for those like us that enjoy a good spanking. A bent over position will stretch out the muscles and skin in the buttocks and upper thigh region, thereby making each hit much more intense. We don’t recommend this position to first timers, and grabbing the ankles is only for the very masochistic amongst us!

Standing - You may be in for a standing ovation after your UberKinky impact play! Well, standing whilst being spanked may be less painful that being bent over, however it is far less relaxing. Movement is also likely to affect the accuracy of the hits. For this reason, it may be a good idea for the bottom to have something to hold on to. Or, you could add a little restraint to your retribution!

Doggy-Style - For those really naughty pets! Enduring a spanking whilst down on all fours will really show the bottom who their Master is. It will also keep that beautiful rear-end on display, for some heavenly humiliation play. The muscles and the skin are stretched whilst down on all fours, therefore the spanking will be much more powerful.

Restrained - Are you ready to be tied down? Well, although restraints are not necessary for your spanking scene, they will certainly add a little something extra. In addition, they will keep the bottom firmly in their place and restrict movement, helping you to avoid hitting other delicate areas. It’s always harder to hit a moving target! You can tie up, down or to furniture, the choice is yours.

Spanking Tools
Please don’t be a tool when it comes to choosing your spanking device! Remember; this is a very important decision. You need to be aware of the strength and intensity of your chosen instrument, so that your spanking is always spot on. Here are some popular choices that have certainly made an impact on all of us here at UberKinky ;)

Hand
hand

We’ve got to hand it to you; you really are giving this guide your undivided attention! The hand is the most commonly used tool when it comes to delivering a supreme spanking, but is arguably the least severe. The bottom should expect a thuddy sensation which is unlikely to leave any lasting damage such as welts or bruises. Although excellent for stimulating the nerve endings, it is less painful than other tools and may therefore need more force behind it.

Cane
cane
Caning delivers a sharp, intense and stingy pain, which is likely to leave marks and bruising on the skin. The lower end of the cane (rather than the tip) should be used for spanking, and to avoid injury it should never overlap the desired area. This tool is lightweight and easy to control, but don’t cane it; you don’t want to end up with lasting damage!

Flogger/Cat-O-Nine Tails
Clove Hitch
A flogger consists of a whip-like handle with multiple thick tails. It is typically made from leather (or similar) and delivers an intense, thuddy pain with every strike. Floggers vary in the markings they leave on the skin due to the diversity of their movement. For those just starting out, we recommend a flogger with thick, rounded tails, although we know a lot of you think you know best… so we won’t keep flogging a dead horse!

Paddle
paddle
Avoid getting in too deep when you opt for a spanking paddle! Although less severe than many long range implements, paddling will deliver some nasty bruises. So don’t go overboard, we don’t want you damaging that muscle tissue. The thudding sensation experienced is somewhat similar to a hand spanking; however it is much more intense. Typically a paddle has a handle and a wide surface area for covering all its bases.

Whip
Whip
For a submissive that is ‘whipped’ in more ways than one! Not only an impressive punishment device, a whip can also be utilised as a directional tool for some Demon HeadMaster/Mistress action. A whip is long and thin, with a real sting in its tail, which is likely to leave the bottom rosy cheeked and marked. Always practice with a whip beforehand and never use a bullwhip unless you have had significant training.

Tawse
tawse
This is the ultimate in corporal punishment for really naughty boys and girls! A tawse is a thick strip of leather which is split into a number of tails at one end. The amount and length of these tails varies. Similar to a flogger, it delivers an intense and thuddy pain which causes reddening of the skin.

Riding Crop
riding crop
So, you’ve never tried spanking before, but you think you’re ready for a riding crop? Whoa, slow down! You’ll have to work your way up to a stinger like this. The slightest arm movement will produce an aggressive bruise and the flap of leather (or similar) at the tip will create red marks on the skin. In addition, this stick-like instrument delivers a beautifully sadistic sound as it cuts through the air, so be careful not to wake up the neigh-bours!

Strap
strap
This tool really is the definition of ‘strapping’! Typically a broad, heavy strip of leather, with an easy to grip handle, a strap is easy to control and can be used in a variety of positions. Don’t get carried away; it’s a real stinger and guarantees to leave a lasting impression.

Of course these are only some of the many instruments that can be used for spanking. Please refer to our diagrams below, which show in more detail the pain and skin markings you can expect from each.

We recommend that beginners start by spanking only with the hand, gradually increasing intensity.

When you are both comfortable, move on to a short range implement and slowly work your way up.

Always test new tools on yourself first and steadily increase the force at which you hit.


It is important to vary the frequency and placement of spankings. Some people like to follow each hit with pleasurable stimulation, but that is entirely up to you. Here at UberKinky we try to time each hit so that they are approximately three seconds apart.

Short Range Long Range Spanking Intensity

Aftercare

Well, it’s pretty much a given that the bottom will be feeling slightly tender after their severe punishment! So in order to help them feel brand spanking new, here are a few tips.
After an intense impact play scene (think canes, whips and severe flogging) the bottom may slip into sub space. Some may drift between reality and sub space. Some may be an absolute shaking, blubbering wreck not from the pain but from the chemical rush. Be ready to provide cuddles, reassurance, a drink of water, a soft warm blanket and a bit of chocolate to nibble on. Give them the time and space to recover; we don’t want them coming back down to Earth with a ‘thud’!

www.uberkinky.co.uk/essential-guides/impact-play-guides/beginners-guide-to-spanking.html