Communicate verbally or otherwise what you want. Tell him what you do and don’t like. Oral sex is a low-risk activity for HIV transmission but higher risk for other STIsand high HIV risk if there are ulcers, mouth cuts, bleeding gums or any cuts to the cock. Condoms are your best defence against infection.
It’s one of the most popular sexual activities among gay men – while not everyone likes it, most guys have tried and enjoyed it at least once. Giving head (oral sex) doesn’t take much preparation and can be done almost anywhere but there are three musts: control, comfort and feedback.
Control
To give good head, you need to be in control of the process, especially if less experienced. Ask your partner to lie down on a bed or sit in a chair, or something similar, where you can control the angle and speed of sucking and stop for a breath if you need to.
Comfort
After control comes comfort. Try to match the angle of his cock to the angle of your throat. So, if his cock bends upwards, you might be better in a 69’er position (that is, straddling his body with your mouth approaching opposite his cock), and if it bends left or right, try to approach it from that side.
Comfort also comes into play when deciding how much cock you can, or want to fit into your mouth in one attempt. Grip his shaft firmly, at the base near his pubes, with your hand. Unless he is fairly large it’s better to use your thumb and first two fingers rather than your whole fist, otherwise you may not be able to fit much in.
Next, you need to make sure that your breathing is regular, in time with each thrust. Without good breathing you won’t be able to relax, and will lessen your enjoyment and his.
Comfort also means comfort for him! It’s easy if you remember a few simple rules.
The easiest part – talk to your partner and listen to him. If you’re tired or bored, let him know, and ask him if he likes what you’re doing!
- Position yourself to match his shape and angle. If his cock bends to the right, suck from the right.
- Being in a position that gives you more control means you are going to be able to give better head.
- Breathe normally as he goes in and out; don’t hold your breath. Swallow or spit to get rid of extra saliva. If he is thrusting too much, hold on to his cock.
- Always be aware of where you teeth are - teeth and penises don’t play well together!
It’s one of the most popular sexual activities among gay men – while not everyone likes it, most guys have tried and enjoyed it at least once. Giving head (oral sex) doesn’t take much preparation and can be done almost anywhere but there are three musts: control, comfort and feedback.
Control
To give good head, you need to be in control of the process, especially if less experienced. Ask your partner to lie down on a bed or sit in a chair, or something similar, where you can control the angle and speed of sucking and stop for a breath if you need to.
Comfort
After control comes comfort. Try to match the angle of his cock to the angle of your throat. So, if his cock bends upwards, you might be better in a 69’er position (that is, straddling his body with your mouth approaching opposite his cock), and if it bends left or right, try to approach it from that side.
Comfort also comes into play when deciding how much cock you can, or want to fit into your mouth in one attempt. Grip his shaft firmly, at the base near his pubes, with your hand. Unless he is fairly large it’s better to use your thumb and first two fingers rather than your whole fist, otherwise you may not be able to fit much in.
Next, you need to make sure that your breathing is regular, in time with each thrust. Without good breathing you won’t be able to relax, and will lessen your enjoyment and his.
Comfort also means comfort for him! It’s easy if you remember a few simple rules.
- No teeth – biting too hard or not covering your teeth with your lips can be painful for him; also sucking too hard, thrusting him into your mouth too fast, or wrenching his cock hard with your hand.
- Sensitive, sore or tight foreskins can be a problem for some guys and they might not be able to handle the friction for too long without needing to stop. (also see the ‘Sealed Section).
The easiest part – talk to your partner and listen to him. If you’re tired or bored, let him know, and ask him if he likes what you’re doing!
Oral sex technique
Here are some techniques to please your man.
The lollipop lick
With your man sitting in an elevated position and you on your knees in front of him, lift his hard cock to reveal his balls.
With your tongue find the underside of his balls. Now, while resting his balls on your wet tongue, lick in an upward motion to the very tip of his cock. Do this several times like you were licking a lollipop or ice cream. If it helps, keep his dick steady with your hands.
The butterfly flutter
The best position for this is kneeling in front of the guy you are going to blow, if he is on his back kneel between his legs. Get the head of his dick into your mouth (your lips just on the other side of his coronal ridge) and create enough suction to keep him there without holding him.
Now with your lips firmly wrapped around his cock start gently flicking the tip of his cock with your tongue. You may have to do some slight adjustments so that you are able to keep up this flicking motion on the end of his dick without it turning into licking. Keep this up for as long as you can, and then alternate it with the basic vacuum suck.
Corona twirl
Place your wet lips around the head of his cock and position them on the coronal ridge, then twirl your lips gently. This works simply because this is one of the most sensitive areas of his cock. Sucking on this area will produce a quick powerful cum for him.
This technique works for getting him hard again quickly after he has cum. Try twisting your head side to side making sure your lips stay in contact with the coronal ridge – you can gently move your hand up and down his dick shaft as well to increase the sensation that his cock is being encased. Remember, be aware of your teeth!
The circle
Get his hard dick in your mouth but don’t tighten your lips around the shaft. Slowly begin moving your head in a circle motion. His dick will slide around to different places in your mouth as you continue it. Again, watch your teeth! A kneeling position is OK for this one or with your partner on his back and your head directly over his dick. Perform the circular motion in both clockwise and anti-clockwise directions slowly and purposefully.
Hot and cold breath
Go down onto his cock as far as you are comfortable, keeping your lips firmly wrapped around the shaft. Now open your mouth and suck in as much air as your lungs will hold whilst lifting your head up so that your mouth travels up to the head of his dick.
Stop this upward motion at the head as your lungs get to their full air capacity. Now, with your mouth still open, let the air out slowly through your mouth as your opened mouth travels back down the cock shaft.
This technique cools the cock on the upstroke and warms the cock on the downstroke. Do this for as long as you like.
The travelling figure eight
With your lips firmly wrapped around his cock shaft try very slowly to reach the base of his cock, or as close to it as you are comfortable. Your nose should be buried in or at least touching the pubic hair at the base of his dick.
With your nose, begin to trace the shape of a figure eight as if it were laying on its side – imagine it about three to four inches long.
Slowly travel up the shaft of his cock to the head, doing the figure eight motion. Keep doing this motion and let your lips firmly travel up and down his cock. Do this for as long as you feel comfortable with it.
The lollipop lick
With your man sitting in an elevated position and you on your knees in front of him, lift his hard cock to reveal his balls.
With your tongue find the underside of his balls. Now, while resting his balls on your wet tongue, lick in an upward motion to the very tip of his cock. Do this several times like you were licking a lollipop or ice cream. If it helps, keep his dick steady with your hands.
The butterfly flutter
The best position for this is kneeling in front of the guy you are going to blow, if he is on his back kneel between his legs. Get the head of his dick into your mouth (your lips just on the other side of his coronal ridge) and create enough suction to keep him there without holding him.
Now with your lips firmly wrapped around his cock start gently flicking the tip of his cock with your tongue. You may have to do some slight adjustments so that you are able to keep up this flicking motion on the end of his dick without it turning into licking. Keep this up for as long as you can, and then alternate it with the basic vacuum suck.
Corona twirl
Place your wet lips around the head of his cock and position them on the coronal ridge, then twirl your lips gently. This works simply because this is one of the most sensitive areas of his cock. Sucking on this area will produce a quick powerful cum for him.
This technique works for getting him hard again quickly after he has cum. Try twisting your head side to side making sure your lips stay in contact with the coronal ridge – you can gently move your hand up and down his dick shaft as well to increase the sensation that his cock is being encased. Remember, be aware of your teeth!
The circle
Get his hard dick in your mouth but don’t tighten your lips around the shaft. Slowly begin moving your head in a circle motion. His dick will slide around to different places in your mouth as you continue it. Again, watch your teeth! A kneeling position is OK for this one or with your partner on his back and your head directly over his dick. Perform the circular motion in both clockwise and anti-clockwise directions slowly and purposefully.
Hot and cold breath
Go down onto his cock as far as you are comfortable, keeping your lips firmly wrapped around the shaft. Now open your mouth and suck in as much air as your lungs will hold whilst lifting your head up so that your mouth travels up to the head of his dick.
Stop this upward motion at the head as your lungs get to their full air capacity. Now, with your mouth still open, let the air out slowly through your mouth as your opened mouth travels back down the cock shaft.
This technique cools the cock on the upstroke and warms the cock on the downstroke. Do this for as long as you like.
The travelling figure eight
With your lips firmly wrapped around his cock shaft try very slowly to reach the base of his cock, or as close to it as you are comfortable. Your nose should be buried in or at least touching the pubic hair at the base of his dick.
With your nose, begin to trace the shape of a figure eight as if it were laying on its side – imagine it about three to four inches long.
Slowly travel up the shaft of his cock to the head, doing the figure eight motion. Keep doing this motion and let your lips firmly travel up and down his cock. Do this for as long as you feel comfortable with it.
Deep-throating
Positioning is key to deep-throating. The cock usually curves upwards and the throat curves downwards, so the more you can get the two to work together the greater chance you have of getting his dick to a point beyond your gag reflex.
Probably the best position for this is to lay on your back with your head dangling over the edge, just enough so that your throat is in a straight line. This means that he can insert his cock, avoiding your soft palate (and therefore the gag reflex) and usually so deeply that his pubic hair presses against your lips. Another good position is the 69 as the cock will curve down your throat. Another trick is to swallow. When his dick gets to a point where it’s beginning to feel uncomfortable or that you are going to gag – swallow.
Excess saliva can make you gag so get rid of it from time to time.
Bend down, get under it. Being ready and getting into a rhythm will make gagging less likely.
Probably the best position for this is to lay on your back with your head dangling over the edge, just enough so that your throat is in a straight line. This means that he can insert his cock, avoiding your soft palate (and therefore the gag reflex) and usually so deeply that his pubic hair presses against your lips. Another good position is the 69 as the cock will curve down your throat. Another trick is to swallow. When his dick gets to a point where it’s beginning to feel uncomfortable or that you are going to gag – swallow.
- Remember that you can’t breathe and be down on a cock fully at the same time because you are blocking your air passage.
- Start slowly. If you are tense, it won’t work. This may mean that you start and/or practice with someone you have a bit more trust with than just a quick shag.
- Some guys don’t like being deep-throated. Watch his responses and adjust accordingly.
Gagging
Gagging can be uncomfortable, damage the lining of your throat and cause entry points for infection like HIV. We gag when a cock blocks our airway.Excess saliva can make you gag so get rid of it from time to time.
Bend down, get under it. Being ready and getting into a rhythm will make gagging less likely.
Cum and your mouth
It’s best to avoid cum in the mouth altogether because STIs can still be transmitted even if there are no cuts or sores present. If it happens:
As long as you have no infection or cuts in your throat, swallowing is relatively safe because the stomach acids will kill any nasties in the cum.
- And it’s deposited at the back of the mouth: it might be best to swallow.
- If it’s deposited in the front of the mouth: consider gently spitting.
As long as you have no infection or cuts in your throat, swallowing is relatively safe because the stomach acids will kill any nasties in the cum.
