As an gay body builder, I like to put on shows. That’s not a permission slip for you to paw on me!
Ever since I came out, I can remember getting turned on by groups of strangers watching me get off. I think the first time it happened was when I was 21, during a visit to the baths.I was in the shower with another guy, swapping oral back and forth. Several people started to gather around and before I knew it the small group had turned into a crowd.
After the experience, I knew that I was hooked.
But that was over 15 years ago. I’m in my late 30’s now and have embraced my identity as an exhibitionist. In the world of gaydom, exhibitionism is when a guy likes to do things in front of other men. In other words, it’s about putting on a show.
I mention gay specific exhibitionism because in the straight universe, the term “exhibitionist” holds negative connotations. Example: The creep who wears a trench coat and flashes his genitals to people on the train.
That’s not me.
I prefer to do my thing in gay operated saunas, steam rooms and clothing optional resorts. Occasionally, when it feels safe, I might do something with another guy at a non-gay establishment, like a hotel spa in Las Vegas. But if it’s the latter, I have to feel super safe because it’s kind of dangerous.
On some level I guess, the “showy” part adds to the excitement.
In any event, the reason I asked to have this article published on this gay blog is because I want to tell you something that most exhibitionists want to say but never do.
There’s no gentle way of saying it so I’ll just come right out and just do it. Here it goes:
Just because I’m an exhibitionist doesn’t mean you can touch.
Christ on his throne – I can’t tell you how many times I have been inside another man while other people watched and some a-hole ruined it by trying to insert themselves into the act. It completely kills the moment!
Most guys like me who put on shows have a certain type. In my case, I prefer men my age with athletic builds.
But there are other exhibitionists I know who gravitate towards heavier, older guys – like polar bears and pot belly men.
My point is that just because we are doing something in front of you doesn’t mean it’s OK for you to touch. Just last week, I was at a gay resort in California, messing around by the pool with an athletic otter.
And so while I was laying back on a lounge chair and the otter was riding me, a group of men started to gather and watch.
I was loving it.
But then, a not so attractive grizzly bear reached from the side and started twisting my nipple.
I told him to stop – twice no less – but he just wouldn’t listen. I ended up having to push the idiot away. But the damage had already been done. My wood had completely gone soft and the guy sitting on me eventually got up and left.
That wasn’t the only time something like this happened.
Several years ago, I was up in Saugatuck, Michigan where another incident occurred. In case you don’t know, Saugatuck is a summertime gathering place for gay men. They have trailers and cabins and large swaths of forest that are part of the great outdoors.
I think you get the picture.
So one night in the woods, I was messing around with this guy while he held on to a tree. As we did our thing, a small group began to form a circle.
It was great! Well, that is until an aggressive onlooker thought it was OK to get behind me and start playing with my butt.
Do you know how annoying it is to be topping some guy while having to act like a flyswatter at the same time? Let me tell you, it’s annoying.
Guys, I realize that as tribe, many of us are sensitive to rejection. I know I certainly am. But seriously, you are setting yourself up for being hurt when you try to thrust yourself into an exhibitionist’s show.
You see for men like me, it’s all about having people watch – not touch. The more turned on you get eyeing us, the more excited we become.
It’s OK to touch yourself and even make encouraging comments. But unless you are invited, please keep your hands to yourself.
Trust me, if we want you to join in – we’ll let you know.
www.gaypopbuzz.com/exhibitionist-gay-no-touching/
